July 18, 2014

When God Knows Better


I have shouted these words, cried out these words, and whispered these words under my breath a number of times since my husband died.
Within moments He reminds me very clearly and lovingly every. single. time, "You were never MEANT to do any of this alone."  
And all at once I am reminded of His sovereignty.  I was never meant to........
in those few words I see it.
His foreknowledge.  He knew this was coming.  He could see things I never could have imagined.  He was preparing me.  Building faith in me.  Perfecting and finishing all of those things He intended for us while Justin was here.  

How can I not see His Hand in all of this?
In every detail leading up to and even in his passing?  

All of it was EVIDENCE that God had gone before me and was standing WITH me.  

I was never MEANT to go this alone.
He knew what was coming.  Would He not see to the details of tomorrow as much as He was seeing to the details of today?  How many things were ordered in such a way that I could have never manufactured on my own.  

Can I not just trust my tomorrows to Him?
Knowing that He sees things I cannot see.  He knows things I cannot possibly know.  And He is able to work every detail, every circumstance, no matter how much heartache I might have to face, to my good and for His glory.  After all, that's what it all comes down to.....my life is not my own.

Whatever it is I face He is not such a God that He would abandon me to do it on my own.  He will prepare me for my tomorrows and sustain me through my every day into every GOOD thing He has planned for me. He knows what I need for each moment and is MORE than able to meet my EVERY need.
Seeing Him in THIS moment.......no matter what I may find here......that's a gift.  

In ALL of my days.
In the mess.
In the struggles.
In the sinfulness of my humanity.
Goodness isn't an elusive dream just up ahead that I am relentlessly pursuing.
Goodness is HERE.
It follows me. Wave after wave of GRACE and GOODNESS.
These moments need God-perspective.
If only we could see God Himself in this moment here....it would take our breath away.
God is good.
And every moment God IS.........is GOOD.
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