September 21, 2010

The Voice

The VOICE

I have to tell ya'll a funny story and what God showed me through it!

As a mom I am genuinely a light sleeper. An EXTREMELY light sleeper.

I hear my children's breathing change. (From another room). I just have always been a light sleeper.
I think it's a mom thing.

One night very recently I was so utterly and completely exhausted (imagine that) that I actually had dreams. WONDERFUL dreams!
I was sleeping so soundly and deeply that my son's face was near me as he was tapping me on the shoulder saying, "mommy....mommy....MOMMY....MOOOOOMMMMMY!"
I about fell out of bed as I realized how long he must have been standing there. Wondering how long ANYONE could have stood there and me be completely oblivious and unaware. (which was a scary thought)
Once I caught my breath...I dealt with the issue at hand (he had to go potty and somehow since it was the middle of the night he needed directions to the bathroom and permission to go!)
Anyhow....once that was all handled...I fell back to sleep.
Back to dreaming...

Somewhere deep in my dream I hear a giggle.
A deep in the throat kind of giggle.
I sleep.
My dream goes on.

There's that giggle again. Only a little louder. And vaguely familiar.
And with it...comes a mumbled phrase.

I sleep.
And dream.

This time I hear a giggle only I'm aware that I am actually awake and hear a mumbled phrase after the giggle.
I stand in the hallway only to hear DEAD silence.
Now I'm freaked out...because if there is something in the house that has woken me up and I can't find it...then I cannot go back to sleep.

I laid in bed. Staring at the ceiling.
Blinking.
Hoping that someONE or someTHING will giggle.
Nothing.

I finally go back to sleep. It is now 5 am.
I hear 2 giggles. And 2 mumbled phrases. I can make out the phrase now. It says, "HOORAY!"
And a giggle.

Oh man! It's a TOY! (Did I mention I hate toys that talk!) I stand once again in the hallway. Waiting.
I hear it again. A giggle and a "HOORAY" and a voice counting blocks. "ONE BLOCK....TWO BLOCKS...HOORAY!" (Very affirming toy)

I finally find the perpetrator (pooh bear) and put him out of his misery.

I said all that (not only because it's a funny story to me now) but to say this.......
How long does it take God's voice to get to the point where I actually can recognize it and be aware of it?
Am I so caught up in everyday life that His still small voice is only a vague recollection in the back of my mind!? It sounds familiar.
But I keep moving on.
It keeps catching my attention.
But other things catch my attention more.
What is He trying to say to me?
Is it even HIM?
Do I have time to stop and hear him?
We're so caught up in this microwave/ fast food/ get-it-now and get-it-your-way society that
We really have a hard time WAITING for ANYthing!
The lines, waiting rooms, being on hold on the phone, waiting for something to come or something to happen. Having to wait drives us mad. We are so used to having things immediately.
But sometimes.....we do have to shut out the rest of the world and take a moment (sometimes two or three or more) and wait. And listen.
He's not in a hurry.
He'll take all the time He needs to in order to speak to us. But we have to be willing to listen. And wait.
His voice is quiet. We always need to be in eager expectation of His voice...listening for it. So we don't miss it.

Stop and take time to hear his voice today. He speaks to us constantly. I just wonder how many times it takes Him for me to recognize that it's HIM!!
I don't want to miss His voice!
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